Author:
Simulacrum
<
nub
>
66.140.106.15
Use
this link
if you want to link to this message and its entire thread of discussion.
Date:
10/29/2011 1:57:32 PM
Subject:
Special post for Bili
Here are the two posts from my landmark thread at MBM titled "I don't think I can finish Orcs Must Die":
Well, technically, I can finish it, but I would have to settle for a less-than-perfect 5-skull record.
I simply cannot get 5 skulls on level 22 ("The Squeeze"). I have reloaded this level more than twenty times, but I cannot keep every orc out of the rift. I've watched youtubes and tried every technique, every trap formation, every weaver variation. I'm simply not fast enough to pull it off. I have 4 skulls but this is like getting the Medal of Crapness at the Warrior Mage Olympics.
Also, last night I felt my head enlarge 20% beyond its normal size, a sure warning that it was about to explode. Also, the wife told me that I was getting "crabby." So maybe it's time to move on. I know I have quit before, but this time it's real.
........................................................................................................
Hmm. By "less-than-perfect 5-skull record," which doesn't make any sense, I meant a record in which I earned fewer than 5 skulls for every level.
Can you identify with this intolerable situation?
There are 24 levels.
I have 5-skulled 21 of them.
What boots it if I have 21 perfect levels and EVEN ONE of the remaining three is imperfect? What kind of accomplishment is that?
Would NASA have settled for stranding monkeys on the moon? Would America settle for anything less than 100% failure in educating every citizen? Would PBS do a two-hour Lincoln Center show without dragging in an annoying fat opera singer?
I think the common thread here is plain to see. Americans don't settle. They don't try. When they set out to do stupid things, there is only do.
I would rather quit now than bring shame on my country. Let the record show that I knew I was not the Chosen One, that I stepped aside for better men, that I put America first.
I would rather be buried in an unmarked grave than have "Levels 1-21 5 skulls, Levels 22-24 4 skulls" engraved on my tombstone.
