Author:
Smoof
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Date:
8/16/2019 4:05:37 PM
Subject:
Welp, I'm White as fuck.
We moved to a new neighborhood about a year ago in a new city in which we had never lived. This neighborhood is pretty nice, no HOA or anything, but what we discovered is that there's a Covenant in this hood and a bunch of fucking old ass white people with not a whole lot to do.
So it turned out, we started getting quite a few weeds in our yard, since the PO didn't want a water bill and yanked out all the grass and cut down the old growth trees (who the fuck waters trees anyway?) and just left dirt. We were hoping for a low/no maintenance yard, but it turned out to be pretty heavy last summer with all the weeds. We actually started getting harassed by Code Enforcement via the Covenant because people were calling them on us about the weeds; we started taking care of them, but there were a lot and it took us quite awhile, so they kept harassing us. Then they started harassing us about the piles of pulled weeds that we had yet to throw away and so on. Seemed like Code Enforcement was ringing my doorbell and bothering me every day about something, because some old white fucker had a bug up their ass.
Well, earlier this year we had the side yard dug up, put down weed paper and several stages of rocks, ending in some pea gravel so that it would effectively extend our driveway with gravel. Well, turns out parking my car on that riled the old fuckers again and they started calling Code Enforcement because my car was parked on the gravel driveway, so I had to stop doing that.
But of course, there's some fucking Boomer on the street just over from mine that has a fucking huge 50' camper that he parks, along with his big ass F-350, partially on the sidewalk. Which is god damn obnoxious, because not only is it entitled as fuck, it forces me to walk out in the street when I'm walking my kid. So what have I done? I started calling Code Enforcement. If everyone else in this neighborhood wants to be petty, than I can be too. It makes me feel White as fuck, but god damn am I sick of the entitled assholes in this neighborhood. I like my house, I like the neighborhood, but this place is just so fucking white, I miss my old house in the Barrio, where everyone just kept to themselves.
I thought not having an HOA would be fine, but it turns out City Covenants can be just as obnoxious.
