Author:
Simulacrum
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Date:
5/14/2010 6:27:07 AM
Subject:
Quality oatmeal thread
In less than an hour, I plan to have some oatmeal. No toast or bacon or other additives. Just pure oatmeal. This is the most virtuous way I can think of to break my fast, for oatmeal is full of virtue. Take your Lucky Charms and your Fruity Pebbles and go away. I shall have none of them.
O sumptuous Cereal-Prince, illustrious carbohydrate-dispensing Post or Kellogg, is there no way of “killing” thy brother but processed sugar's rude way! “A well-nourished man by the very look of him, by his very presence with us as a fellow wayfarer in this Life-pilgrimage, promises so much”: woe to him if he forget all such promises, if he never know that they are given! To a deadened soul, seared with the brute Idolatry of the Cereal, to whom going to Hell is equivalent to not eating cereal, all “promises,” and moral duties, that cannot be pleaded for in Courts of Cereal, address themselves in vain.
